Soul Mates / by Michael Nichols

Think for a moment about the term "soul mate." Ever find yourself wanting one? That means a few things, first and foremost of which is the fact that you have to cop to the fact that you are a soul. But then that happens to mean that there's more to you than a throbbing body full of nearly uncontrollable hormones. That would mean that there is something beyond a physical being, and something more that pulls you to another person than the hormones they pump out or the pretty face you see. That also means something that you may or may not believe: there is someone out there for you. But I know that this is hard to believe sometimes.

So who are you? Do you even know who you are? Do you even know why you feel this way?

I've been struggling lately over the issue of finding my "soul mate." In the modern era, we date. As a matter of fact, I have been down that road twice. And for what? What was I looking for each time? I didn't know. But I do now. I've been talking a lot with my pastor about different things, and from time to time, this subject has arisen, and he basically said this: find a friend.

Hearing this, I stopped dead in my tracks. Well, at first, I kept nodding my head in agreement, because I knew he was right, but then it hit me... I knew he was right. And I wasn't abiding by that.

As humans, we're like puzzle pieces. Since Eden, we've been fractured in half: part wanting good, part wanting evil; and no matter how much we try to stop it, the fractures become more and more like cracks in a pane of glass. We get caught up in these things in life that lift us up just to tear us down in the end. Abuse, unemployment, hunger, ridicule, rejection, violence, impairment through drugs and alcohol, disease, sexual immorality that leads to unprepared pregnancy and possible STDs (depending upon the situation which may or may not be made fully known to any one party's members), and the list goes on of things that hurt us, and the things we hurt people with... Back to the puzzle pieces thing, we seek to be made whole, though not to unite the good with the evil, but to shift that which is in darkness into the light, and to reunite with what was once ours to share. And for some reason, we can hardly make sense of any of this until we find someone to care about besides ourselves, because, when you are alone, you will not have the desire to preserve another because, after all, you're just gonna die that way, right? Wrong. Your end is what you let it be.

And that means you're gonna have to wait. Yes, I, a hypocritically impatient soul with a patient face, said you're gonna have to wait. Patience builds faith, because, when you cease to give up on hope of loving someone and them loving you, you give up on failure. To embrace only victory is to never embrace defeat. If you stay on the ground, you cannot walk. Get up. It's NEVER over. The only thing that makes ANY difference in this life - and it doesn't matter if you believe it or not because it's true regardless of that - is what happens to your heart: is it worth anything dead and alone? is this life worth anything without the timeless God of everlasting life and peace? is the time on earth that we have ANY good if we can't give ourselves away to those who need what Jesus Christ has given us? He DID, after all, turn a few fishes and loaves of bread into enough to feed THOUSANDS!

You know, the worst failure of any religion is to NOT cop to the fact that there is a single defeating factor in their world view. Paul the apostle realized this and has this to say...


Now, brothers, I want to remind you of the gospel I preached to you, which you received and on which you have taken your stand. By this gospel you are saved, if you hold firmly to the word I preached to you. Otherwise, you have believed in vain.

For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures, and that he appeared to Peter, and then to the Twelve. After that, he appeared to more than five hundred of the brothers at the same time, most of whom are still living, though some have fallen asleep. Then he appeared to James, then to all the apostles, and last of all he appeared to me also, as to one abnormally born.

For I am the least of the apostles and do not even deserve to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me. Whether, then, it was I or they, this is what we preach, and this is what you believed.

But if it is preached that Christ has been raised from the dead, how can some of you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? If there is no resurrection of the dead, then not even Christ has been raised. And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith.More than that, we are then found to be false witnesses about God, for we have testified about God that he raised Christ from the dead. But he did not raise him if in fact the dead are not raised. For if the dead are not raised, then Christ has not been raised either. And if Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile; you are still in your sins. Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ are lost. If only for this life we have hope in Christ, we are to be pitied more than all men.

But Christ has indeed been raised from the dead, the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep. For since death came through a man, the resurrection of the dead comes also through a man. For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive. But each in his own turn: Christ, the firstfruits; then, when he comes, those who belong to him. Then the end will come, when he hands over the kingdom to God the Father after he has destroyed all dominion, authority and power. For he must reign until he has put all his enemies under his feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death. For he "has put everything under his feet." Now when it says that "everything" has been put under him, it is clear that this does not include God himself, who put everything under Christ. When he has done this, then the Son himself will be made subject to him who put everything under him, so that God may be all in all.


That was the first half of I Corinthians 15 translated in NIV if you have the urge to go look it up at any point. It ends very well. It ends by saying that our deaths in these bodies will NOT be forever, but that we will rise again when Jesus returns. Death will be swallowed up in VICTORY! Now, what person wouldn't like to be transformed from something corruptible into something that can never hurt again? especially having lived the lives we live here, in varying degrees of hurt? Like that passage says, if this life is the only reason we have to trust Christ, we are pretty pathetic. The only thing about that is: JESUS IS LORD, AND HE IS ALIVE! =)

But I've come to this conclusion: this mushy-gushy overly-tense over-sexed over-felt-up over-drunk over-drugged garbage we call "love" isn't worth a dime! A marriage, or even a lesser relationship (which is mostly worthless without a permanent end, aside from what it may teach us), is doomed to fail if there is no FRIENDSHIP to base it on. That's what a RELATIONSHIP means. As for this other garbage, it's not love: it's just a drug to escape our hopeless fantasy! and I'm not saying that it's all bad either (except the perversion and drunkenness) as long as there's actually something to base it on.  But we don't need to escape this fantasy because that's all it is! Love is HERE! When you find that friend that you would die for, that you'd give ANYTHING to see saved emotionally, mentally, physically, or in the sense of falling into the gracious arms of Jesus Christ, THEN and ONLY then can you understand what it means to love someone, and ONLY then can you find your soul mate, because anything less is just a drug: just a little too much can murder you, and too little will never seem enough. Only a vaccine can cure the desire we have. Only Jesus can show us what it means to love. He who cannot die gave His life because He was the only one who could survive it, on top of the base fact that He loves us, and He forgives us. And so help me God to remember that, because I definitely need to. I lived a bleeding life, but now we've left it behind. I'm not alone. And you are not alone. There is hope. There is love. Just have faith. You never go anywhere without believing that running will take you there, and then actually running.

You are not alone.

Sincerely, with love.